he power and beauty of the human spirit

he power and beauty of the human spirit
Television done right. This American Life on Showtime (Sunday at 10) - Just had a show
"Escape" about a guy who has no muscles, but has managed to live into his late 20s. He has a girlfriend, he's trying to move out of the house, but he's on a breathing machine and has been in a coma twice in the past year.

But he's in love. And he writes, he blogs, he wants and is a part of the world as much as he can be. Watching him made me feel good. Not in a "thank god it isn't me" way but in a "this is why I keep trying" way. Sometimes, especially when things are going awry, I wonder "why do I keep trying, I'm just a puddle and things keep going wrong" but then I get over myself and I get back to trying.

Sometimes it feels as though I'm just stupid, too stupid to stop trying even when everything suggests stopping is the only logical thing to do with myself. I guess it's a matter of knowing the limitations and constraints and then artfully dodging them. Remember that character from Dickens, the Artful Dodger? That's me. Artfully dodging my limitations, working within them, putting a pinkie toe outside just to see what will happen.

Oh, and I gained 5 pounds. So, now I have something to do with myself, something to be all manner of self-absorbed about to the exclusion of everything else, which oddly enough, makes me highly efficient in all other endeavors because i want to spend all of my time taking care of my corporeal form again.

Tomorrow is my ostomy anniversary. That makes me smile. What great things have happened for me, what strange and interesting adventures I have taken. I predict there are more to come.

Happy Monday all!