Baby Use What You Got

Well...I'm out. The jig is up, the game is over, it's like me playing Ms. PacMan, never get past level two cause of the friggin' ghosts.

I'm back on medical leave. Emphasis on LEAVE. As in, leave the nice healthy people alone and get your recovering ass back on the farm/rehab whatever, but get there and get there quickly.

Today my grandma called me fragile. Not a word I would associate with myself, personally, but she was being fairly objective and I don't think it's inaccurate. I'm also kinda nuts, being fragile does not help my sanity at all. Ach, well, I like to think the crazy adds spice to my personality.

I'm in my favorite place right now. It's a secret, there is music, obviously a computer, and I get to be naked. Not that I don't like clothes. Now that I'm back on the sick and shut-in list I'm all about getting my shop on. My new website is eluxury.com but there is also bluefly. All I know is I'm gonna get me a LV Suhali collection something. My homie Jen has three, one her mom got her cause it's a nice bag for a young woman (aren't mothers special, we are always being molded), one she bought and is still trying to convince me was not totally inappropriate because it vaguely resembles a physician's bag and she's a MD (she keeps screaming Legit, Legit so you know it's such an illegit bag, but it is purty) and a third evening clutch, which is cool cause you need a clutch for the evenings.

I've been so caught up in my person drams that I've not even gossipped personally. I have three little sisters and do you know one of them told me the other day that she was gonna go to trade school and not college because college isn't "her thing." she's lucky she wasn't within 50 miles or i would have been begging rides just so I could get her to say that ish to my face. Is she on CRACK? Oh god, my little sister has a drug addiction and no one but me knows!!! This is terrible. I'm sure she's just scared, finishing high school is high pressure and the parents do not help at all. I'm 11 years older than her (why did they start all over, must have been bored with my straight As and civic activities and thought a baby would be entertaining. For the record, they lost interest after about 9 weeks and I raised the kids until I went to college 6 years later). Anyway, she's like "yeah, i can go to trade school and become a sonogram tech." now, i'm a woman and i've had the occasional sonogram. i respected the tech but most of them sucked. I saw shit they didn't notice. Me: What's that floaty bit of stuff attached to that major organ? Tech: Um. I didn't notice that.

So, i ask her what a sonogram tech does. I swear to god and six other hindi men, she must have been watching the Everest commercial right then and the list of occupational training must have been scrolling cause she just hmmed and hawwed and mumbled something about crime scene investigation.

W.T.F.? Now I'm confused, they use sonogram techs on dead pregnant women at crime scenes, I ask, cause that's the only connection I can make. And she's hemming some more. Fast foward 46 minutes, I still don't know what what a freaking sonogram tech is but I am clear it is totally unrelated to CSI New York, Miami and Alabama!

About this, I do not know what to do other than fly her self up here, install her in school myself and tell her "take two years and see if anything clicks for you." She's in a bad position, I'm the eldest sister of the younger siblings (that's complicated) and I'm hyperdriven, ambitious and rather smart in an idiot-savant way. She's the middle sister. After her is the baby who is hyperdriven, ambitious, and decided at age 6 she wanted to be a doctor and hasn't wavered a moment since then.

What do you do in that situation? My parents are wrecks. I was being courted by the Ivy League schools and they were like "uh, so, how you gonna pay for college?" It was expected I would attend but in 9th grade mum handed me a Parade magazine and just pointed tothe coverstory of a girl who'd earned 300K in scholarships and said something to the tune of "yeah, you might want to figure out how she did that because we don't have money to send you to school."

So, I did. Ditched the Ivies for a party school and spent 3 1/2 years learning the fine art of acting as ignorant as I pleased while earning my degree.

All that to say, the parents aren't the helpful type. They are the dictatorial type: Go to college. No help on how to get your ass there or anything.

suggestions from my readers to my little sister's problem are welcome. Since I have so much newly free-up time resuming my convalescing I'll work on it a little more.

Okay, time to do some routine moving about. More tomorrow....