P.Y.T.

P.Y.T.
Na-na-na...Miiiiiiiccccccchhhhhhaaaaaaeeeeeeellllll.I always thought Michael Jackson and I would make an amenable couple. He could be all reclusive and mysterious, I could be the muse for his music. Screw the Liberian girl, he could pull a Prince and make an entire album named Camille...

I keep hope alive, though I don't know how I would deal with Mike's disintegrating face now. He used to be so cute - about 20 nosejobs ago. Okay, 15 at the minimum. Now the cartilage in his face won't suppor a nose and he wears a prosthetic like some nasal cancer survivor. Perhaps...no, I won't even posit that, I know in my heart it's a lie even if if makes my head feel better.

This song also made my head feel better:

Light Years Away by Mozella

It's almost like you had it planned
It's like you smiled and shook my hand and said
"Hey, I'm about to screw you over, big time"
And what was I supposed to do?
I was stuck in between you and a hard place
We won't talk about the hard place

But I don't blame you anymore
That's too much pain to store
It left me half dead
Inside my head
And boy, looking back I see
I'm not the girl I used to be
When I lost my mind
It saved my life

It's how you wanted it to be
It's like you played a joke on me
And I lost a friend
In the end
And I think that I cried for days
But now that seems light years away
And I'm never going back
To who I was

Cause I don't blame you anymore
That's too much pain to store
It left me half dead
Inside my head
And boy, looking back I see
I'm not the girl I used to be
When I lost my mind
It saved my life

I think I cried for days
But now that seems light years away
And I'm never going back
To who I was

Cause I don't blame you anymore
That's too much pain to store
It left me half dead
Inside my head
And boy, looking back I see
I'm not the girl I used to be
When I lost my mind
It saved my life

That life seems like light years away
Light years away
And that life seems like light years away
Light years away

I am getting involved in my occupation...day job...again. I've always maintained some level of involvement, I kept my computer running in the hospital and had big fun processing paperwork while hitting the pain pump. I did relax quite a bit the last couple of procedures, being in the hospital really is a full-time endeavor, as is recovery.

Tonight, though, it crept in a little more. I always like the phrase "stealthy paws" and that applies. Incidentally, Valerie (the remix feat. Amy Winehouse on Mark Ronson's Versions) just came on. So, I just came off the phone with one of our subcontractors. At least I know they follow directions well even if the outcome isn't desired.

Lately a lot of my friends have been turning 30 and talking about getting serious about life and their work. They talk about trusting themselves and taking themselves more seriously and honoring themselves. It's all well and good, I'm very happy for them. I've always taken myself seriously, so it's a bit of a mystery how people exist without being serious about themselves and their lives and actually have to come to the realization that one must be direct in their approach to life to have a shot at achieving one's dreams. Diff'rent strokes for diff'rent folks, for sure.

I wonder if, when I turn 30, I will get serious. This past year has certainly re-prioritized my ambitions, I've not discovered any new ambitions - but certain things I valued less have become more important, certain things I thought would take longer to achieve seem easier. The perspective-kaleidoscope has changed.

I watched Mad Money last night and had a very good time. I watched Ratatouille tonight and had an even better time. I don't know what it is about movies set in Paris - perhaps it is the feeling that I am visiting 'home' when I see the spires of the le tour Eiffel. Or when I hear French being spoken. Or the Queen's English. Ah well...

Watch a movie, enjoy a great wine and make love to something - it all does your body and soul good.